Growth
The word growth is generally associated with a positive thing. But what if you don't feel like you have grown at all. I know I have felt that way several times this summer. There are definitely lots of things that I am learning about myself. Even though I can feel confident about my own identity, I realize that the last item in my things-yet-to-be-discovered-about-myself list is nowhere in sight, and it will probably stay that way for an indefinite amount of time.
Although I don't feel that I have grown, I know that my life is not idle. Things in my life keep on coming in and out. Whether its friends, family, or events, they are all constantly on the move. And speaking of moving, I will also be relocating myself back to Ontario in a few days. I was digging through my previous blog posts to try to see what were some of my goals that I've set before I moved to Ontario last summer. The biggest goal back then was my recommitment to God and getting to know Him better through His words. Another goal was travelling to new places. But now... I am not too sure.
I know that I really want to see whether this job is something I would pursue in the future. So perhaps spending more time in my work would be one goal. I also love travelling so I'll do some of that (but not quite as extensive as last summer). But something that has been on my mind lately consists of finding out where I fit in this particular stage in my life. I'm almost at the last page of my undergraduate chapter but not quite ready to dive into the next one; it feels strange. I am praying that God will equip me for whatever happens next. And the only piece of fact that I am going to hold onto is the unchanging and abundant love of Jesus.
Regardless of how other may see me or how I view myself, I know for sure that God loves me despite how broken (and confused) I am. And everyday, I need to remind myself of this fact and give my heart to Him.
Although I don't feel that I have grown, I know that my life is not idle. Things in my life keep on coming in and out. Whether its friends, family, or events, they are all constantly on the move. And speaking of moving, I will also be relocating myself back to Ontario in a few days. I was digging through my previous blog posts to try to see what were some of my goals that I've set before I moved to Ontario last summer. The biggest goal back then was my recommitment to God and getting to know Him better through His words. Another goal was travelling to new places. But now... I am not too sure.
I know that I really want to see whether this job is something I would pursue in the future. So perhaps spending more time in my work would be one goal. I also love travelling so I'll do some of that (but not quite as extensive as last summer). But something that has been on my mind lately consists of finding out where I fit in this particular stage in my life. I'm almost at the last page of my undergraduate chapter but not quite ready to dive into the next one; it feels strange. I am praying that God will equip me for whatever happens next. And the only piece of fact that I am going to hold onto is the unchanging and abundant love of Jesus.
Regardless of how other may see me or how I view myself, I know for sure that God loves me despite how broken (and confused) I am. And everyday, I need to remind myself of this fact and give my heart to Him.
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