Sojourning the Earth. Settling for Eternity.

I want to blog this before I forget. So often I find myself wanting to belong to a certain social group. It can be a circle of friends, a church group, or a workplace. There is a multitude of things that accompany this feeling. The sense of identity and comfort are amongst them. But as I reflect on these things and measure them against what Jesus has taught me, I began to see a striking difference. Jesus said that in order to follow Him, we must deny everything in our lives - even our very own selves. When God has welcomed us into His family, we don't really need to supply ourselves with extra stuff. He welcomed us, just as we are - especially when we are broken and desperate to find meaning in our lives. This is not new to me, but its always refreshing when it is revealed to me in a new light. Here's an analogy: during the weekend, I was spending some time at home with my parents. Unfortunately, I got sick over the weekend but I have to go back to my 'rental' pla...

Thank you, Abba father, for helping me finish my last undergraduate final exam. Its been an amazing journey - these past five years. I can't wait for what You will reveal to me in the future!

He hath made every  thing  beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end. (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

I'm going to copy my friend, RB, and do a post/rant about finishing my last midterm of my undergraduate career (woot). Thank you, God, for all these years and how you've provided for me. When I looked back at all my midterms, I see such a wide range of topics: From computer algorithms to behavioral neuroscience, From statistical methods to philosophy of mind, From linguistics to sociocultural psychology... Man... He provides and He does it well. Cool beans, God, let's tackle the next thing on our list: finals :D

God is definitely at work. How do I know this? For one thing, I begin to re-evaluate my life and question what does it mean to be a "Christian"? How do I define myself as a Christian? This can be such a daunting question. Last year, my primary prayer request to God was to teach me how to fall in love with Him all over again. As I prayed, God just pressed so many different things in my life that I tend to ignore. Things such as: Where do I draw my strength from? Do I base my life on the approval of others? In these past weeks, it has been so hard for me to live my life. I can attribute so many reasons to this ("senioritis", seasonal affective disorder, etc) but it ultimately draws me back to the very question that God asked me in the first place - what is my identity? It is so easy for me to live this "Christian" life and start to evaluate others by my own standards/ expectations. As I was preparing to lead my small bible study group, God definitely aff...

Ever get that feeling when you just feel like something (or someone) keeps nudging you in the inside. Well, that's definitely what I felt two weeks ago. I've never been good at sharing why I believe what I believed. Why do I believe in such a Holy and loving God. What Jesus meant to me. Why should people believe in him etc... My Christian community (UCM) organized a week called Random Acts of Kindness week (RAK). Basically, its a chance for to show our classmates and professors (ie. people on campus) the grace and love that Christ has given so freely on us. We did things such as handing out cookies, washing people's cars, etc. Needless to say, I was terrified. I felt that nudge over and over to do the umbrella walk. Which entails the following: -walking someone to their class when it rains But I felt that I wanted to do more than just that, I want to share with them what I believed. There's a constant battle between God's nudge and my fear, but I stick it ...

Praise the Lord! I have found a placement for my summer practicum. I will be working at a psychology lab on campus. So what does that mean? Spending my summer in Vancouver!

that I go through seasons in life. With each season, there are different goals and life lessons that I believe that God has set for me. Different people constantly come and go. Whether they are close or not, God used them in one way or another to fall in love deeper with Him. But I do have to testify that I did not realize this sooner. Its so easy to get caught up in the busyness and demands of life. Its so easy to get distracted with the drama that comes with life. Instead of focusing on my own deprived needs for God, I began to look for flaws in others to feel superior. Instead of turning to the words of God for sound wisdom and comfort, I seek the counsel and self-pity from other people. I began to understand more and more of what it means to deny myself everyday. My strengths, circumstances, and surroundings are incomparable with knowing and having a relationship with my Heavenly Father. My own personal bubble and my successes are but gifts  that God has cherished on me so ab...

"Of all persons the Christian should be best prepared for whatever the New Year brings. He has dealt with life at its source. In Christ he has disposed of a thousand enemies that other men must face alone and unprepared. He can face his tomorrow cheerful and unafraid because yesterday he turned his feet into the ways of peace and today he lives in God. The man who has made God his dwelling place will always have a safe habitation. " -A.W. Tozer It has been a fruitful and abundant year. Its not an easy year at all, but when I looked back I see how God works in every trials and obstacles that I've encountered. This gives me hope; God's faithfulness and mercy prevails every time. All the time. So what's my New Years Resolution? Its more like prayers actually: 1) I pray for more faith and confidence in this upcoming year. I want to feel excited whenever I encounter adversities. Voddie Baucham said that he felt that way because he knows that God is about to transfo...

Pull me a little closer, Take me a little deeper, I want to know Your heart. Because your love is so much sweeter, Than anything I've tasted, I want to know Your heart.

Niagra Falls - Summer 2012 to remind ourselves that the God that we worship is both powerful and loving. His strength far greater than the force of waterfalls and his love is unmeasurable, as vast as the ocean. I have to remind myself especially with days like today, of God's provision. My prayers are with those who have lost their children in the Connecticut shooting. We live in a broken world and this tragedy should enforce up to develop and pursue a closer relationship with him who gives us the everlasting life. As I was praying, I asked God where He was in this tragedy. To be honest, I was very depressed and troubled by this whole massacre. Yet God confirmed this to me: all those kids are with Him. He was there when the slayings are happening. He was there in the midst of the shootings. He was there to comfort those victims. Not one single child is left behind by Jesus Christ. I am even confident that these children are now safe and sound with Him, at this moment. We are...

Glory to God Alone! My fall semester is done, and there are a few praise items I want to mention: -Thank you, God, for your faithfulness -Thank you, God, for your grace -Thank you, God, for your patience -Thank you, God, for your provision -Thank you, God, for your peace -Thank you, God, for your presence -Thank you, God, that you have Overcome!

Its been a tough semester. Mini essays every week. Challenging midterms. Projects. UCM. I can't believe there's only two weeks of school  class left! After saying that, I do agree that I've grown (again!) so much throughout this semester. To be honest, I entered the semester expecting that I won't do that much work. I picked my courses earlier in the summer, making sure that they are courses that I'd enjoy and that they won't have too much workload. Boy, was I wrong and God truly convicted me of this. I was too confident in my own skills and efforts that I placed God out of the picture... I relied on my own strength, not expecting God to reveal his magnificent power in my life and his desire of partaking in the midst of my daily routines. Selfish.. Prideful.. Insecure.. Yeah, that's what I am. Yet I thank my God that he has new mercy for me everyday. I was so blind coming into this semester and God knows this. He still gives me that freedom of choosi...

One of the misassumptions that I often had (and still guilty of) is that when I spend time with God, He will bless me with more things. Its kind of like earning God's approval by deeds. This is such a preliminary error yet I keep on falling into the same habit over and over again. And if I did put in some time with God and not receive the result that I want, I get disappointed. Such is the case this year, where I try to put God first (more than my other years at university) yet the results that I receive in my classes were not what I anticipated. I've put in quite a bit of time and effort in my courses as well, yet it's still hard to get the marks that I wanted. This circular trap gets me every time. God doesn't want His children to come to Him with an expectation that He will bless us in return. He wants us to come to him with a desire for him and him alone. He wants us to come to him, without expecting God will give His blessing to us in return - no string attache...

What is it that makes human so limited? One of the biggest thing that I've experienced is the fact that I don't know it all. Even if I feel like I've maintained a thorough understanding of a situation (or even of myself)... things happen, circumstances occur, situations change, leaving me with the realization that I haven't got a single clue of what's going on. So how should I respond with respect to all these things? Instead of confiding in Him who is omniscient, I placed trust in myself. Rather than surrendering my all to Him who is able, I became stagnant in my own closed off world. Hence, I become insecure, anxious, and afraid. All I can do now is ask for forgiveness for my own iniquity. My stubbornness. I don't have it figured out. I don't know what's going on. All I want now is you, Lord. I pray that your peace will transcend over me and overwhelm me. I want to be confident in the realm of uncertainties. You are there by my side, I shall no...

Well, I'm back in Vancouver now. Spent some time with the family and now I'm all packed up to move back to the GHouse. I noticed that I'm a pack rat - too many junk in my belongings! Well, I won't try to bring too much stuff this time. Couple of things that I'm really stoked about this year: 1. Living in the GHouse + catching up with people 2. Core leading in UCM 3. Having a close family member on campus 4. Psyc Courses! My friend was telling me that its good to have a motivation behind your work. I'm trying to brainstorm some goals that I want to have this year: 1. Keep on reading and memorizing Bible passages 2. Get into a lab position for my 4th year Cogs I'm sure there are more but I'll focus on that for now :)

1. Half of August is gone 2. I have seven more work days 3. Summer is ending 4. School is starting In other words... time flies by... fast! Its hard to believe that in a couple weeks, I will be taking a flight to return to Vancouver. My time here felt very short.. I can also say that I am ready to go back home. I'm starting to miss my family and friends in Vancouver. I guess living by yourself does make you feel that way sometimes - especially when all my roommates have gone home for the rest of summer. God has taught me quite a bit of things this summer and He also has provided me with numerous opportunities to grow, to learn, and to explore. Some of the things I am thankful for during this summer: A) The opportunity to grow in my relationship with God via reading the Bible. CCF has motivated me to read the Bible and to discipline myself in memorizing some passages. It does bring a new perspective and revelation in the Bible stories that I grew up with and the passages tha...

One of my friend has this statement on his Facebook status: "we've grown up too much, sometimes we forget that we are children of God". There is some truth to this statement. What's interesting is that this statement reminded me of an interesting experience that I encounter a couple months ago, last semester. I was walking around downtown Vancouver, going back to my workplace and I suddenly stopped. I saw a reflection of myself on a store window (this sounds pretty narcissistic haha). But I stopped because I saw myself with a nice dress shirt, formal pants on, hair gelled stylishly, wearing a nice pair of dress shoes. And I thought to myself: "Wow, I'm all grown up. The world awaits me...real life awaits me". To tell you the truth, that IS a scary thought! To be given the freedom to do what you want to do with your life and the independence from my family... I just feel like I'm not ready at all.  But I can't avoid it, I do have to face reality (...

Something that my friend shared. A good consideration, definitely worth reading through. Where is God in tragedy?